Skip to main content


Showing posts from 2009

Crissi Bubbz CSI: Tiger Woods

Todays episode: Par for The Course starring our favorite Caublacasian Tiger Woods After a tossing and turning for hours, Elin Leighterhosen Woods heads to the kitchen for some warm milk only to find her husband Tiger snorting a bit of the Coka Ina. Elin is furious about Reports of Tiger infidelities and now- once again- he's tootin his nose. Frustrated with each other they begin arguing, Tiger grabs Elin by her arms & says "Look Bitch! If it wasn't 4 me you'd still be sniffing baby shit 4 a living! Get off my back!! go carve some clogs or summin!" Elin, who talks with her hands bcuz she sounds like the chef from the Muppets, scratches TDubb (thats what they call him in the streets) in the process. Since messing up a brothas face - even a ¼ brotha- is a cause 4 murder, TDubb collects himself & goes out to the escalader with Elin chasing behind him & screaming in Swenglish in the driveway. Tiger speeds into the street & just as the the coke


So THIS hit the innanets this week & had everyone going bat sh*t crazy over the Alien princess. As you can see by the title, I- Me, Myself, Personally- could care less & actually, I’m quite afraid of this “comeback”. I’ve gotten used to seeing her “leaving restaurants” or “leaving *insert high end store here*” and THAT I can handle. Her singing…not so much Yes, it has been a peaceful year without new screeching music from the pop princess. My ears already numb to the sound of her past “hits”. So to know that there is a another audio assault creeping up on us makes me want to volunteer to be deported…wait…I was born here so I’d be reported? Moved? F*ck it – you get my point! I am curious to know how she ever expects the “Alien” comparisons to stop when she pulls stunts like this: I mean…WTF…nevermind…I’m not one to discuss a problem without a solution so I have some other career opportunities Rihanna could explore that don’t involve dog calling singing: 1. Model- She i